Keeping Score

The last time the Saskatchewan Roughriders experienced a loss as painful as Sunday’s — it was 1976; hello there, Tony Gabriel — they promptly missed the playoffs for 11 consecutive seasons. . . . Which means we may not see ’Rider Nation again until 2021. . . . When Saskatchewan fans remember their team with a 16-point lead and 10:32 left in Sunday’s fourth quarter, well, it only makes things worse. . . . You’re right, Audry, Santa Claus won’t be wearing green and white this year. . . . South Carolina declared a tax holiday on firearms purchases for Black Friday, which resulted in NBC-TV’s Jimmy Fallon pointing out: “No taxes on guns — because one thing you want right after people have been drinking and arguing with their families is gun purchases made easier.”

Steve Simmons of the Toronto Sun thinks that Wayne Gretzky or Bobby Orr should light the Olympic torch in Vancouver in February. Uhh, no. I’m thinking it should be Tiger Woods, whose reputation has been going up in flames for a week now. . . . This was the week in which a new phrase entered the sporting life, as in: “What we have here is a Tiger situation.” . . . Mike Lupica, in the New York Daily News: “By Saturday morning, nothing much had changed in the Tiger Woods story, which means that we were still supposed to believe that his wife, Elin Nordegren, somehow turned one of Tiger’s Nike SQ drivers into the Jaws of Life.” . . . Headline at Fark.com: It was Mrs. Woods, in the driveway, with the golf club. . . . Headline in the Sunday Express: Was he fleeing the ire of the Tigress? . . . Jeff Gordon of the St. Louis Post-Dispatch: “Who will get a bigger contract this winter. Matt Holliday or Elin Nordegren?” . . .

Dan Wetzel, over at Yahoo! Sports: “This isn’t John Daly smashing a car as he pulled out of an Arkansas Hooters. This is Tiger Woods. Nothing ever happens with Tiger Woods.” . . . Headline at sportspickle.com: Phil Mickelson Cockily Celebrates Successful Trip Out of His Driveway. . . . B.D. Gallof, at huffingtonpost.com: “The big loser in all this is Buick, who for all their redesigns and reworks, still can’t get their spokesman to actually use the damn thing. Instead he peels off, probably using half a tank of gas to dent a fire hydrant?” . . . Jerry Crowe, in the Los Angeles Times: “Tiger Woods has accomplished the heretofore virtually unthinkable: He has made himself even more famous. . . . Who knew a fender bender could inflict such damage? . . . Based on what we’ve seen and heard this week regarding the world’s best golfer, Tiger doesn’t date cougars.” . . .

Prior to Tiger’s weak-kneed apology, I thought a transgression was when you threw a club and it bounced into the crowd. . . . Gary Loewen, in the Toronto Sun: “Was it quick-thinking on wife Elin Nordegren’s part to grab a golf club and smash a couple of windows of the Escalade to help her husband, or should she have tried the door handle first?” . . . Dave Perkins of the Toronto Star: “Well, it probably won’t be long now until Tiger and Elin show up on 60 Minutes, holding hands and setting the record straight. Just like, you know, Roger Clemens did.” . . . Dwight Perry, in the Seattle Times: “An anonymous buyer plunked down a record $10.8 million for a rare, 5-carat pink diamond at an auction in Hong Kong on Tuesday, Reuters reported. Insiders vehemently deny it was Kobe Bryant. No word from Tiger Woods.” . . . Has anyone ever fallen so far so fast? Sheesh, Tiger, the entire world is laughing at you. Jay Leno should be so lucky.

The 2009 World Baseball Challenge was such a hit in Prince George that it will be back in 2011, and the Toronto Blue Jays will be on board as a major sponsor. Paul Beeston, the Blue Jays’ president and CEO, wrote a letter to the WBC folks, congratulating them on the success of the 2009 event and adding: “The Blue Jays are proud to join the growing list of sponsors committed to the 2011 World Baseball Challenge. . . . Given the profile of this tournament, we trust that many other sponsors will want to be a part of this event going forward.” . . . Despite the view of life in the TRU athletic department that was presented in these pages Thursday — through the rose-coloured glasses of athletic director Ken Olynyk — all is not peaches and cream in the TCC-based offices. The buzz is that WolfPack basketball coaches Thom Gillespie and Scott Reeves aren’t talking to Larry Read, the school’s sports information officer, which is why weekend press releases were barren of quotes. With the records those two coaches have — this season, their teams are a combined 2-14 — they should be thrilled that anyone over there still wants to talk to them.

When Devan Dubnyk made his NHL debut with the Edmonton Oilers a week ago, he became the fourth former Kamloops Blazers goaltender to make the big time, after Corey Hirsch, Steve Passmore and Daryl Reaugh. . . . You will recall that Dany Heatley, like a few players before him, rejected overtures from the Edmonton Oilers over the summer and ended up with the high-flying San Jose Sharks. Here’s Robert Tychkowski of the Edmonton Sun, before the Sharks visited Edmonton last week: “This is like running into an ex-girlfriend a month after she dumps you. She’s holding hands with a Tom Cruise-looking fighter pilot, and you’re asking if they’d like fries with that.”

Gregg Drinnan is sports editor of The Daily News. He is at gdrinnan@kamloopsnews.ca and gdrinnan.blogspot.com. Keeping Score appears Saturdays.