Kennedy brings message to Kamloops

By GREGG DRINNAN
Daily News Sports Editor
Sheldon Kennedy and Wayne McNeil brought their message to Kamloops on Monday.
Kennedy and McNeil, who work out of Calgary, are the co-founders of Respect in Sport, a program that acknowledges, according to its website, that “creating a safe and fun environment for all children taking part in any activity should be the No. 1 priority of all sport and community leaders.”
There is more — lots more — to it than that, which is what Kennedy and McNeil were to tell the Kamloops Sports Council (KSC) and representatives of various sports organizations in a session last night at the Tournament Capital Centre.
Respect in Sport arose from the ashes of Speak Out, a program Kennedy helped develop that was designed to prevent harrassment and abuse in minor sports.
“We created (Respect in Sport) and we implemented it across the country,” Kennedy said, adding that “we’ve trained more than 3,000 hockey coaches in (B.C.) alone since Sept. 1.
“We needed to create a vehicle to actually reach people with a consistent message and a positive message.”
Kennedy started working on these projects a few years ago, after admitting publicly that he had been sexually abused by his coach, Graham James, while playing for the WHL’s Swift Current Broncos. On Jan. 2, 1997, James pleaded guilty to sexual assault and was sentenced to 3 1/2 years in jail.
Kennedy said Respect in Sport, all of which is done online, isn’t about pointing fingers. It’s about getting the bullying, abuse and harrassment out of our society.
“What I found was a lot of the education around these issues was about trying to catch the bad guy,” Kennedy said. “The odds of that (happening) aren’t very good. It all comes down to power. It’s really about us as adults being leaders.”
Kennedy uses words like “respect” and “positive and negative power” in discussing the program. Which is why Respect in Sport isn’t aimed at educating children who are playing minor sports.
“We’re about adults,” Kennedy explained. “We’re about the coaches and we’re about the parents. You take one program and you’re covered. If you’re a coach in 10 sports, you take one and you’re good. You get recertified every four years.
“The coach (program) is to educate them about these issues so they know what to do. If a kid comes to them, they know what to do, how to handle things. . . . They know that ripping a kid all the time is not going to make them want to come back all the time.”
The parent program, he said, is “all about unrealistic expectations” and maintaining perspective.
“It’s not about pointing out bad people,” Kennedy said. “It’s about, ‘I can be better here. That is something that I can change.’ ”
While with the Broncos, Kennedy was teammates with Peter Soberlak, the chairperson of TRU’s physical education department and a vice-president with KSC. Soberlak has taken the Respect in Sport programs and has said he wants them to be mandatory here.
And, as Kennedy said, it’s all or nothing with Respect in Sport.
“We don’t sell it unless it’s mandatory,” he stated. “Either you have the values or you don’t. People don’t say ‘This is a wicked program in our community, we love this, love this, love this . . .’ and stick it on a shelf.
“We’re in this to deliver and to have social change.”
Kennedy said they already have “trained more than 65,000 people.”
Gymnastics Canada is a client and the program, he said, “is mandatory for every gymnastics coach across the country.”
Sport Manitoba also is a client, something Kennedy said covers 70 sports.
In Manitoba, he said, “If you want to be a youth leader, it’s mandatory.”
Kennedy and McNeil arrived yesterday in time to have lunch with Mayor Peter Milobar, Byron McCorkell, the City’s director of parks, recreation and cultural services, and Jeff Putnam, the sports development and business operations manager.
The message there, Kennedy said, was all about the opportunity adults have “to shape the lives of these young kids.”
“Less than one per cent of all registered kids in any sport ever make a life or career out of it,” he stated. “So our focus needs to be on making sure that they keep wanting to come back, that they leave each day with a positive self-image, that they want to show up the next day to participate and when they’re 65 they want to come and walk the track . . . and they don’t hate sports for life.”
Kennedy knows of what he speaks because he only returned to playing hockey about three years ago. Kennedy, who went on to play 301 games in the NHL with the Detroit Red Wings, Calgary Flames and Boston Bruins, didn’t even skate for six or seven years. He first had to get rid of his anger and bitterness but now, he said, he feels better than he has in years.
“I actually go out and have fun playing,” said Kennedy, who skated with the Flames alumni team in Taber, Alta., on Sunday night. “I’m having fun playing the game. I wish I could have played feeling this way, instead of . . . I can’t describe the craziness.”
Kennedy said he never enjoyed the game after his first session with James.
The last time Kennedy enjoyed playing hockey?
“You have to go way back to minor hockey for that,” he said.

gdrinnan@kamloopsnews.ca
gdrinnan.blogspot.com

MORE FROM SHELDON KENNEDY, about Respect in Sport:
“The reality is that a lot of people have an understanding that something’s going on but nobody does anything. Are they all bad people around that bad apple in the basket? Absolutely not. But we need to reach the 99 per cent of good people involved in the game and in sport and in the community and educate them . . . give them the tools to do the right hting.
“That’s kind of what our whole basis is.”
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“In this day and age when somebody signs up to be a coach, whether it’s tykes or juniors, we automatically have that power and we may be the only trusted adult in that kid’s life. Who knows what’s going on on the homefront? By putting ourselves in that position we need to prepare ourselves with education to be able to act if something happens.
“If a kid comes to us because we’re in that position, how do we handle that?”
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“Our whole goal is to create a platform for conversation. There is no magic pill when it comes to this. It’s about conversation. People have gut feelings that something isn’t right. Let’s give them the tools to act on that.”
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“From Day 1, I have never been out to get hockey. Hockey has really shown a leadership role. They’ve tried to put programs in place. They’ve shown that they’ve been proactive.
“For me, that’s about moving on.”
(The WHL is believed to be preparing to get involved with Respect in Sport, and make it mandatory for all of its coaches, parents of its players and anyone who billets players.)
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“Because of the Theo (Fleury) stuff and his book, there’s been a lot come up. It has given me the opportunity to reflect back to 12 years ago. Graham was already charged by police and I remember the articles that came out. I was still the bad guy. There’s no way Graham was wrong. Right?
“And the doors we had to break down . . . the stuff . . . I remember rollerblading across the country and trying to walk in to get organizations to back you and nobody wanted nothin’ to do with nothin’. Now, 12 years later, people are accepting of change and I think . . . we took an issue that has been around since mankind and . . . this was one of those in-the-closet deals and we’ve kept it front and centre because of a lot of people.
“We’ve got the Canadian Red Cross that we work with and have worked with since Day 1. We’ve got all the media people who have been supportive of the positive change. We’ve got Wayne (McNeil) . . . we’ve got guys like Peter Soberlak being a leader in the community. We have to have leaders in each community.”