Brad Dickson of the Omaha World-Herald is in the Christmas mood. . . . He writes: “The Nebraska Legislature Christmas pageant has been canceled. They couldn’t find three wise men.” . . . Dickson, again: “On Sunday, the public got to tour the 91,480-square-foot Nebraska Governor’s Mansion. I’m pretty sure the average town in Nebraska is about 80,000 square feet.” . . . “Once per year,” Dickson writes, “the Nebraska Governor’s Mansion is open to the public. This allows Democratic politicians to see what the inside looks like.” . . . One more from Dickson: “United Airlines has a new baggage policy. What? Are they now going to send the suitcases to the same city as the passengers?” . . .
Kylie has a 2017 lingerie calendar coming out. I also have a calendar, but I just write “underwear” each day so I don’t forget to wear it.— Bette Midler (@BetteMidler) December 19, 2016
The Saskatchewan Roughriders went 5-13 in 2016 and missed the CFL playoffs. On Wednesday, 11 days before Christmas, members of the team’s training staff were given their walking papers. . . . The departed include Schad Richea, a former Regina Pats’ trainer who had been named the Roughriders’ head athletic therapist in January. . . . Hey, when you go 5-13, you have to pin it on someone. . . . Also in the grinchy spirit: The big oil companies, who pumped up the price of gas last week. But, then, that shouldn’t surprise anyone, should it? . . .
72% of Leafs fans are scared Trump will cause the end of the world just as the team is getting good— Stats Canada (@stats_canada) December 16, 2016
Bill Littlejohn, our South Lake Tahoe, Calif.-based correspondent reports: “Evidence is mounting that the Russians, led by Vladimir Putin himself, exerted heavy Internet influence on the recent U.S. election. Suspicions were heightened when one unnamed state ballot initiative had the choices 'Da' and ‘Nyet.’ “ . . . Here’s Janice Hough, aka The Left Coast Sports Babe: “Fired Oregon coach Mark Helfrich says he hoped Chip Kelly would be hired as the new Ducks football coach. ‘Ditto,’ said many fans of the San Francisco 49ers.” . . . Hough, again: “As fans await the end of the 49ers’ season, remember that San Francisco was sure it could win without Jim Harbaugh as head coach. And it has — six times in two years.” . . .
Trump won't attend daily U.S. intelligence briefings. Apparently, they're a schedule conflict with his Russian intelligence briefings.— Stephen Colbert (@StephenAtHome) December 13, 2016
Headline at Fark.com: Giants alert NFL office over Steelers’ under-inflated footballs / League suspends Tom Brady four more games. . . . The other day, a readerboard at Kennedy’s Auto Pro in Halifax read: Things that tell the truth: small children, drunk people and yoga pants. . . . As proof that NBA regular-season games are all but meaningless to some teams, the Cleveland Cavaliers didn’t dress stars LeBron James, Kylie Irving and Kevin Love for a game in Memphis last week. The reasoning? It’s a long season and the players need rest. That got Richmond, B.C., blogger TC Chong to wondering: “What’s next? A bye week for NBA teams?” . . .
In U.S., media crazy with fear Trump will to start WW3. In Canada, Peter Mansbridge just warned Albertans about "car licking moose". We win.— randy turner (@randyturner15) December 16, 2016
RJ Currie of SportsDeke.com reports that wrestler-turned actor “Dwayne (The Rock) Johnson said on The Tonight Show that his daughter has a fear of mall Santas. I’m thinking it’s Claustrophobia.” . . . Currie, again: “Anyone else secretly hoping Jose Bautista gets shipped to Boston? Only Tom Brady could deflate that ego.” . . . One more from Currie: “The Cleveland Browns will lose one home game next year to play an NFL game in England. At first the team protested, but Cleveland fans insisted.” . . . Currie was watching Thursday’s NFL game, the one in which the Seattle Seahawks appeared to be covered in green slime. Or, as Currie put it: “At any given time, it looked like 11 grinches stealing the Los Angeles Rams’ Christmas.” . . .
RIP, Zsa Zsa Gabor. This 2007 @VanityFair profile of her has some fantastic writing. pic.twitter.com/JpY3xI2cAV— Adam Proteau (@Proteautype) December 19, 2016
ICYMI, the Seattle Sounders won the MLS Cup the other evening, beating Toronto in a shootout despite not being able to muster even one shot on goal through 120 minutes of real play. As Torben Rolfsen, who hosts The Rolfsen Report on TSN 1040 Vancouver on Saturday mornings, put it: “Zero. Also the number of new soccer fans the league's showcase game created.” . . . Why are car dealers allowed to sell so many vehicles whose turn-signals don’t work. I mean, if they worked the drivers would use them, wouldn’t they? . . . Headline at SportsPickle.com: Donald Trump to also honor professional wrestling champions at the White House. . . .
You know that eight-year-old grandson who stuck his tongue on a froze pole. Kid got me today. Drew a black spider on roll of toilet paper.— Terry Jones (@sunterryjones) December 19, 2016
Congrats to Derek Evely, a veteran Canadian track-and-field coach who had a successful stint with the Kamloops Track and Field Club and will be inducted into the Burnaby Sports Hall of Fame on Feb. 23 at the Firefighters Banquet Hall at Metrotown. Evely is a graduate of Burnaby Central who finished sixth in the decathlon at the 1983 world junior championships. From a news release: “His athletes have set 13 national records. Eight have earned 33 national team positions and 10 won 71 national medals including seven who captured 39 titles. Four of his athletes – Sultana Frizell, Sophie Hitchen (U.K.), Dylan Armstrong and Shane Niemi – have won 13 international medals.” Yes, those are hall of fame-calibre numbers. . . .
“I am a marvelous housekeeper. Every time I leave a man, I keep his house.”— BuzzFeed News (@BuzzFeedNews) December 18, 2016
— Zsa Zsa Gabor (1917—2016) pic.twitter.com/0JD7ZWJFM5
A tweet from ESPN’s Mike and Mike radio show points out that the last three Pittsburgh Steelers head coaches have 442 victories between them; the last three Cleveland Browns head coaches have won 14 games. . . . Rob Vanstone, in the Regina Leader-Post: “After a no-expenses-paid, two-week vacation in New York, it is time for more futile lobbying. We want ESPN! Don’t forget ESPN2, ESPN Classic, TNT and NBC Sports Network. All is not lost. At least we have the Christmas Fire Log.”
(Gregg Drinnan is a former sports editor of the Regina Leader-Post and the late Kamloops Daily News. He is at email@example.com and twitter.com/gdrinnan. Keeping Score appears here on weekends, except when it doesn’t.)
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